Dept. of Long-And-Tall

Long John and a tall chic

There is different things that can be long and tall. There are two domain-names that trying to beat eachother:
thelongestdomainname-intheworldandthensome-andthensomemoreandmore.com (the hyphens is put on not to crash the site's design) is the first competitor and thepersonwithanewideaisacrank-untiltheideasucceeds-by-marktwain.com the second.

Another thing is tall persons: Defen Yao", a Chinese girl at 7'8 1/2. Surely she would be able to score a couple of points in NBL.

Of course there is a site which check the Sites with longest running systems by average uptime. I mean: if a site is down I get mad. If it's not - I don't care.

And of course some geek did the World's Longest Palindrome 17,259 words with his programming skills. (A palindrome is a "A word, phrase, verse, or sentence that reads the same backward or forward.").

When media breaks one can think back on all the 633 episodes of Gunsmoke one have missed. The site Longest Running TV Shows have tracked the shows which have run 160 and more episodes.

Dept. of Graphic-Reluctancy

Splendid name, splendid picture: totally meaningless

I don't get the meaning with this but it's pretty funny. And the domainname is very good but rather easy to spell the wrong way: MeccaDonald's Happy Meal!

Dept. of Time-Consuming-Counting

600,426,974,379,824,381,952

There are 600,426,974,379,824,381,952 ways to spell Viagra. This really important fact is told by Cockeyed. Viagra is a pill to take when your potence is weakening. Seems like Cockeyed ain't getting some - there's no other explanation. And using Viagra seem subliminal...

Dept. of Nationalistic-Tits

Take one for the country

Those girls knows what it takes to be a country in war. They serve the best they can, showing up in tight linens at the basecamps of the soldiers going to Iraq.

"It was back in February of 2003, when a lot of troops were leaving Ft. Benning. My girlfriends and I were partying at a bar frequented by soldiers. At some point one my friend leaves with a young soldier. The next day we questioned her and commented that the soldier didn't seem her 'type'. My friend just shrugged and said, 'Hey, his unit was going to ship out in a few days, so I decided to take one for the country', I knew right then and there that this was an incredible idea, so I started Operation Take One for the Country"."

And at their homepage you yourself are invited to sign up for duty.

Yeah. Right.

Dept. of Searching-For-The-Guy

Do not feed the animals

The police in Albuquerque (off-topic this town has the most hardly spelled name I know of) searching for a man who lost his finger when poking the jaguar at the Zoo. They are doing it by taking a fingerprint of the bit-off finger.

Wouldn't it be easier just to call the hospitals? (nbc4.com)

Dept. of Food-That-Make-You-Mad

Blame it on the carbs

Avril Lavigne blames carbs for her angry lyrics. Of course. There's always something to blame for what you are doing. In the sixties the one to blame was the state, in the seventies blame fell on the system. The eighties people blamed their parents and ancestors. In the nineties the market and the capital were to blame and now we blame the carbs. Is this what we call evolution?

"I was eating bad stuff," Lavigne said. "Lots of sugar and carbs, junk food all the time. It makes you very irritated. I spent some time with a nutritionist and learned I had low blood sugar. Now I eat accordingly." (do anyone see the pun in this?). Read more horror stories about what the evil carbs will do at CarbWire.

Another site that blame it on the carbs (I suppose since that would be the only logical explanation) is McMurder. These people are holding the belief that there's statistically more murders when you got a McDonald's restaurant nearby (hello - the McD-hangouts are everywhere). The prove it by using an extensive timeline since the sixties.

To be honest - they got silch when coming to the fact that statistically there's something called random.

Dept. of Engadgets

A g33k-couch

I want to have one of these - a mousepad couch made from about 1500 (blue) mousepads. Might not be the best couch for making out but hey, life ain't only sex.

If you want to put down your ass into the strange furnituristic gadget you have to go to Rochester Inst. of Tech. and look for some science-coordinator of some kind. Or just shout: "I wanna sit on the mousepad couch!"

Dept. of Political Opportunism

What the people want

The art of being elected to office is giving people what people want or else, promise not to take away the things they already got.

The Guns and Dope Party is giving people what they want. Although they think so.

We advocate
[1] guns for those who want them, no guns
forced on those who don't want them (pacfists, Quakers etc.)
[2] drugs for those who want them,
no drugs forced on those who don't want them (Christian Scientists etc.)
[3] an end to Tsarism and a return to constitutional democracy
[4] equal rights for ostriches.

Or this is just another hoax. Funny? I don't think so. Strange - clearly.

Dept. of Risen-From-The-Dead

Kaufman pranks the world

Ever heard of Alan Kaufman? No? His most famous apperance is the one when Jim "The rubbermask" Carrey is portraying him in the movie "Man On The Moon". And the thing we learn in that flic is that Andy Kaufman was a hoaxer big time. But as the story goes he died from cancer.

Or did he just staged his death? He says it himself at the blog Andy Kaufman Returns.

Your guess is as good as mine but I put my dinero on that there is someone who want to see how far this joke can go.

Dept. of Knitting

Making your own bag

For me duct-tape is what to use when rig the PA. There's a wonderful story about when a singer in a band was sent to the store to get duct-tape. But since he is very 'economic-minded' (or you could call him stingy) he was returning to the set with rolls of tape to be used in the freezer...

This Duct tape bag was a real home-work. It feels a lot 80's. But the site is good since you can make your own duct-tape bag - there's a walk-through and all.

Dept. of Stupid Titles

Wank the movie

Have you seen "BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE VAGINA" yet? Or have you watched "TOPLESS BRAIN SURGEONS"? You might be the one for "WILLIE WANKER AND THE FUDGE PACKING FACTORY"?

Nevertheless, this siteThe 100 Worst Porn Movie Titles is a proof of that the pornobiz might be the stars of new technique but not on the copywriting bizniz.

Dept. of Female-Fat

The museum of girdles

People are interested in various things. There are people who know everything about trains, planes from WWII and here is The Girdle Zone: the lingerie that no woman want to show that she wear.

The interesting part is that the feminists is shouting about an unsound image in the media of women and their looks.

Dept. of Taste-Of-Banana

No more squashed bananas

This product is really thought-out of some that have an urge for bananas. Banana Guard is a plastic shell for your daily yellow and this will never ever have your banana squashed when taking it to school or likewise.

My wonder is: if the banana I buy is more straight - isn't this perfect case totally useless in this case? But hey, $4.99 for each case - and the got nine colors including a "glow in the dark" (when in need of a banana at night I suppose).

Dept. of Notes-In-Pink

The player that you can use in more than one way

Don't you have an urge for a mp3-player formed much like a vibrator? Think of the possibilities? Having an orgasm through the vibrations of Britney's Toxic... or let Nirvana make your way to seventh heaven. And the color - it's super! The Super Drive MP3 Player is what every woman want.

Dept. of Selling-Hair

Bid for the pubes of Paris

Some things is strange and some are stranger. One of the most stupid things (except for those putting up their eight-year old on eBay) must be this. Someone have collected what is said to be the famous (for what?) Paris Hilton's pubic hair. Though the bid was put out someone at Fleshbot was able to screendump it.

So people - question 1: what would you pay for a bag with Paris Hilton's pubic hair?
Question 2: what the hell should you do with it? Smell it?!

Dept. of Useful Gear

An ugly bag with speakers

Sometimes you stumble on gear that seem almost incredible... stupid. And the Ipodspeaker bag is such gear. I mean - the Ipod is a digi-freestylish-player-for-the-individual but with this it becomes the big boom-gear.

I for myself wonder which gizmo-lover would go to the beach with this ugly designed bag.

Dept. of To Much Time

Estimating the unladen swallow

This is the proof that g33ks don't have a life. This guy have used his mathematic skills, his productive (?) time and his creativity to estimate the airspeed velocity of an Unladen Swallow. With a brain like this you surely won't be bored.

Just that you don't have to read his strangely but well-done site the answer is: an unladen European Swallow is roughly 11 meters per second, or 24 miles an hour. I will propably never forget.

Dept. of Ultradefence

The gun for the bedroom

Americans are crazy. Their large discomfort with the every suggestion on gun control. Cause you really need a XM8 to defend yourself. A pretty thing placed under the pillow. Who havent from time to time felt the need of a grenade launcher to put out the neighbours cat? Or the 100-rounds magazine being sure that the bad guy don't raise again. And even if you are a cry-baby this gun is weather safe and can be fired even being soaked in water.

I guess that mr Heston owns one and hunt down stalkers and journalists with it.

Dept. of Popidol-wannabe

Mickey Mouse the bedwear

This guy is serious. He is making a video and a cover on a famous pophit: Aischa. And the video is hilarious, not only since the kid is so serious and have put a great deal of work on the video, but also looking at his room. It's Disney bedwear and cute dogs at the wall. Either he have gatecrashed his kidsisters room or he have a terrible taste (or his mom is tasteless).

Dept. of Radical Measures

Sliding through the doors

Simon Minkoff in the British Medical Society has a really radical proposal - narrow the door into the fast-food restaurants and in that way make it harder for fat people to get into the temples of fat.