Dept. of Children-With-Strange-Names

Branding the child

"U.S. Census Bureau reports that over a thousand babies born in the year 2000 were named after luxury goods."

Isn't this strange? Some more new age-inflicted theorists are seeing this to be a way to convey status and power to the children through their names, something that seem to be almost archetyphical since naming a child should be correlated to the child's personality (example Native American names).

"These attempts to cash in on corporate cachet on behalf of the just-born seem a bit short-sighted because of all the baggage these names carry. What if young Timberland is spooked by the woods? What if Guinness can't hold his beer? How will Porsche feel driving a Neon? And what if the namesake of your brand name baby tanks big time? Just explain to your kid why you named him Parmalat."

My thought is: what if the young homie Lexus Chanel Anderson is jailed for a killing - should the companies owning the brands sue his parents on brand inflicting?